What did 2018 bring for you?
What a f***ing year! 2018 had this crazy way of ripping, yes literally ripping away what didn’t serve me. I remember in April sitting with my mentor Faro and he spoke to a dream he had. Little did I know that it prophesied my entire year.
In his dream he saw me on top of a mountain that had began to crumble. As it started to shake violently, it began to bust apart. He watched as I desperately tried holding onto the top large rock as everything crumbled underneath me. I was struggling to hold on for dear life, so as to not get lost in the dangerous chaos. As it rumbled and exploded apart I was forced to let and fall along with it. He woke just as I let go and surrendered to what I could not control.
After sharing this dream with me, he stared deep into my eyes and held a space of silence for me as I digested the metaphor. I knew my life shifting hard but had no idea what was next.
Within two days my place of employment hit a financial disaster, the owner decided to keep it quiet and act as though nothing was happening. The lack of integrity screamed in my ears and in that moment I resigned. Once I left the building that afternoon, chaos amongst the staff hit and somehow the fault landed into my lap causing a complete shit show and full disconnect from the entire team.
The next day, my relationship crumbled and my daughter began plans to move back in with her father. This broke me in a way I was unprepared for. I desperately tried to hold on and “save” my relationship only to discover there was intention with another woman. I was forced to let go fully and surrender to the unknown. Not an easy task for a woman who was always 10 steps ahead of her own plan.
Within a month I was moved out and again forced to surrender all of my material possessions, absolutely everything from furniture that took me 15 years as a single mother to attain, down to my truck and even ¾ of my closest.
From the outside looking in, it could have appeared as though I had lost everything, hitting rock bottom. But the truth, once I decided to surrender, I gained everything. Having everything fall away created space for where I now stand.
Over the course of the summer and early fall I still found areas of my life where I was trying to hold on so desperately. One area at a time I found myself reflecting on each belief I was holding onto. As I saw how it was not serving my highest good, I slowly cut the cord … sometimes with a shit ton of hesitation but eventually I let it all go.
It was the beginning of October that I discovered something that changed it all for me. During one of my many Be No-thing sessions (some call it meditation but I literally prefer to let go and open to nothingness instead) I was flooded with a vision and download to the awareness that has changed my world and way of being fully.
As most of us, I spent my life giving my all. Giving my heart fully, my guidance, my money, my time and my energy with the belief that “If I give, I receive.” What I am going to try and explain to you now is that this is all ass backwards. We have been conditioned in our world that we are not enough, so with this we have been taught to give and give and give, leaving us waiting to receive.
The vision I had was a black sky, full of stars. The stars all had this beautiful string of light connecting them all, forming a matrix that turned into the flower of life. Everything became connected with light flowing freely and evenly from point to point, with no starting point and no end to it. A continuous grid of frequency.
The message that came through was;
“There is nothing that exists outside of you. Everything pulses through you, for you, with you. You are the universe, you are the stars, you are the matrix living an experience through one manifested star that is part of all that is. Do not give energy or power to anything that exists outside of yourself. There is no universe to give praise to, for you are it. In order to create the physical manifestation your mind desires, allow the pulse of all that is to run through you.”
If we only give, we are blocking the receiving of flow. By trying to give first, we put our focus only in one direction creating a false hope that we will receive thus creating a stopping point in the matrix.
If we open and surrender to the pulse of all that is through us, receiving this energy, this frequency, then we become one with all that is. No starting point, no end point to creating, living, receiving and giving.
If we become captivated with mind and thought, and allow the lust and greed of receiving to be the focus, we again create a blockage.
As everything began to fall away for me this year, I saw how trying to hold on so tightly was actually preventing me from receiving what my soul was aching for. It’s terrifying to let go, our minds get all caught up in the story of “what if” and fear of the outcome. It took some practice for me to surrender but as I did more and more loving connections began to find their way to me, giving me a support system and unconditional love like I had never experienced. Even though I have been working as a Spiritual Advisor for nearly two decades, I was still having moments where I couldn’t be my own voice. These loving connections like magic appeared every single time I became weak.
I watched my life transform fully, every time I surrendered it opened up space for more to flow through me. My body started to become lighter, my mind empty and yet the inner euphoria kept increasing. My clientele increased without effort and laughter and joy took over my days. New amazing experiences kept finding me and then the last piece of my desires, a life partner, landed in my lap.
Here I sit on New Year’s Eve, so full of gratitude is actually aches a bit. With this energy, I am receiving so fully it floods me and now it's time for me to give knowing that what I am giving, is actually just the flow of me receiving back the joy with this exchange.
Two things left to say;
1 - allow yourself to receive fully. The energy is there, everything you desire is there if you allow it flow through you, with you, for you. You deserve that darling.
2 - I will giving away a FULL FREE year forecast package on January 11th at 11am. My way of showing gratitude to a year of incredible moments with you. I have been so blessed with my small following, sharing messages and dreams, working with you all one on one.
This gift of being a 5th generation born psychic and spiritual advisor is not something I take for granted. I cherish each session so fully, receiving joy and gratitude watching as my clients begin to live the life that their soul has been aching for. So Thank you, for being a part of my happiness.
Here is the details on how to win the FREE FULL 2019 personal forecast, free remote healing and a full session with my own personal mentor.
Step one: help me to be able to give more by helping me grow my following. Follow me on Instagram @rebelliousawkening and if you care to on facebook as well, Rebellious Awakening.
Step two: each day from January 1st through to January 10th, I will be posting my 10 ten steps to self love, one step a day.
Like the post, receive 1 ballot.
Share the post, receive 5 ballots.
Send me a DM on how this has an impact on you or simply share your thoughts receive 5 ballots.
Refer a friend who joins us and sends me a DM telling me who referred them to the page, you both receive 10 ballots.
*You must be a follower in order to win. This prize has no cash value.*
Thank you for making the end of 2018 truly amazing. I look forward to supporting you unfold your dreams in 2019.
Love you. Madly.
Christine xo
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